“Sorry son, don’t like the haircut”

DAMN I was going to sleep.

This from Malcolm Turnbull:

“NYTimes: Prison Population Can Shrink When Police Crowd Streets http://t.co/1a6vHnuL”

Oh thank you Malcolm. Another pass-on from America, where someone can get shot for entering the wrong driveway, can get mass-beaten by police, but where the relentless propaganda is that the best way to protect freedom is to curtail the individual and empower the instutution. Let someone carry a gun, but put RFIDs on students; let the gun makers thrive, and use drones to spy on citizens.

Back here in Australia, I am old enough to remember a darker era of policing, exemplified by what was a catch-phrase in the 1970s and 1980s:

“Sorry, son, don’t like your haircut.”

So here’s a story I’ve related before: that I knew someone who was arrested – not gently – on a charge of “resist arrest”. That’s sufficiently recursive to boggle the mind, but the most salient detail – the one that got a 1980s magistrate laughing out loud at an uncomfortable police prosecutor, is this.

At the time of the arrest, and at the court appearance, the individual in question was immobilised by a leg cast (plaster, not one of those plastic scaffolds we use now) that started at the pelvis and ended at the ankle.

The entire thing was a joke: merely a probationary constable getting a dose of the red mist at a cricket match, grabbing someone from behind at random, and taking exception when they tried to brush off the hand. The individual in question is and always was one of the most harmless people imaginable. Not harmless as in “wouldn’t harm a fly”, more “harmless as in Bernie Fraser would need four pounds of dope, a fifth of scotch and a hammer-blow to the head to be so laid back.”

To be more personal. I’ve been spread-eagled by a country cop for the crime of being the first to arrive at a car accident. I wasn’t in the accident, I was just the next car down the road, and someone else called the ambulance, and the ambos called the cops, and my teenage nemesis saw red when he saw me. The ambos talked him down.

Or there’s the friend of mine who didn’t even have to break the speed limit to get hassled: merely driving a 1970s V8 Ford Falcon Cobra (in imitation of the Moffat car that won Bathurst) was enough.

And personally? I’ve never even managed an arrest – which is probably an admission of failure as a journalist – let alone a conviction. I’m boring and somewhat conventional.

No, I won’t feel safer with an infestation of street police to take offence at my haircut or face.

And if I had one wish, it would be for the Liberals to stop telling Australia is should copy America in all things. I vowed long ago never to return to the USA, and I don’t wish it to be imported to Australia.

Skippy and Sonny talk data retention

“Tsk-tsk, tsk-tsk, tsk-tsk-tsk-tsk-tsk”

“What’s that Skippy? You need wide-ranging and draconian powers over the innocent activities of ordinary citizens? But why would you need that?”

“Tsk-tsk, tsk-tsk”

“Because it’s harder and more expensive to investigate a crime after it’s been committed. I don’t understand, Skippy. If the crime hasn’t been committed, what is there to investigate?”

“Tsk-tsk, tsk-tsk, tsk-tsk-tsk-tsk-tsk”

“You can’t really believe that. Not everybody’s a criminal, Skip.”

“Tsk-tsk, tsk-tsk, tsk-tsk-tsk-tsk-tsk”

“Nobody is innocent? Doesn’t that sound more like the sort of thing you’d hear in an oppressive regime than in a place like Australia?”

“Tsk-tsk, tsk-tsk”

“I didn’t say it was like the Stasi. I was just wondering whether you were seeking power which was excessive and could ultimately be abused?”

“Tsk-tsk, tsk-tsk, tsk-tsk-tsk-tsk-tsk”

“Let me get this straight, Skippy. You’re saying the power could be abused if you were the kind of police force that abused its power, but that this has never happened in your experience as the kangaroo in charge of the entire NSW Police.”

“Tsk-tsk”

“But isn’t the proposal for data to be retained about everybody in all of Australia? Would you have the same amount of trust in all the police services in all of the states, at all times from now until forever?”

“TSK-TSK, TSK-TSK, TSK-TSK-TSK-TSK-TSK!”

“Well, it wasn’t meant to be an insult, Skip. Merely an observation that you can’t predict when there may or may not be a corrupt officer, or a group of corrupt officers working in concert, who may at some time abuse their access to all that stored data.”

“Tsk”

“Well, no, Skippi. I mean, yes, I do realize that there are all kinds of nasty people out there. However, these seem to be massively in the minority, since obviously most of us are not in prison, nor are we under suspicion, nor are we under investigation.”

“Tsk”

“What’s that again?”

“Tsk”

“What do you mean, ‘only because you don’t have sufficient power or resources?’”

“Tsk”

“So if all of us were, in fact, police, and all of us had the power to request a warrant to inspect the stored telecommunications data, you’re absolutely confident that you would be able to demonstrate evidence that all of us had committed, were in the process of committing, or were likely to commit a crime of some kind?”

“TSK!”

“Except the police, yes. You’re a very sick kangaroo, Skippy.”

Seriously: if Andrew Scipioni meant to scare the hell out of anyone paying attention, he succeeded. I have seen the NSW police commissioner say some creepy things to the camera in the past – he appears to regard pretty much the entire citizenry as already guilty of some crime or other – his performance in front of the Parliamentary Spooks’ Committee was terrifying.

Such is Scipioni’s utter disregard – no, strike that, such is his utter contempt for the rights of the citizen, Scipioni has made a good case for his removal from his post. The sole reason to have a police force is to safeguard the rights of freedoms of the citizen.

No free country should tolerate a policeman who resents the very rights he’s supposed to protect.

Added: Someone on Twitter just reminded me that Scipioni was in charge of the NSW Special Crime and Internal Affairs unit, at a time when members of that unit were faking evidence to get phone taps against people they didn't like. Nobody on the parliamentary committee thought this taint worth bringing to his attention, heaven knows why.

*If you’re not Australian, or too young, you need to understand that Skippy was a television kangaroo which communicated using little “tsk-tsk” noises.